Hi and Lois, 6/23/16
Because the Flagstons are a a stereotypical upper-middle class family living in the suburbs in what appears to be the ’50s or first half of the ’60s, I’ve always assumed they’re Episcopalians. The Episcopal Church has a page on their website that says they believe in justification through faith, though they don’t use the “faith alone” formula, and anyway, even the most hardcore Calvinist sees good works as flowing naturally from true faith. Nice try pushing antinomianist heresy, Ditto!
You’re a plugger if technological advances have made the services you need to live inaccessible to you.
Hi and Lois, 6/17/16
Comics where the punchline relies on visual information absent in the first panel are a venerable tradition! They must be awful confusing for the poor souls who have to set up the jokes though, like this hapless teen talking to Chip here. “Wait, have we … been in this yard the whole time? Why did I think he was a lifeguard at a pool? Who am I? Will I ever appear again? Or will I fade back into the nothingness from which I came?”
Six Chix, 6/17/16
I simultaneously think this cartoon is terrible and also love it immensely. I have lots of questions about the world-building here — like, are the toilets in the men’s room full of liquor specifically for the benefit of dog patrons? Or did the dog come here because of their liquor-toilet gimmick? Does the dog belongs to one of those women? Or do they just know his name because he’s a regular at this weird, empty bar? But I think the best part is that the dog is walking on two legs. Two legs! Is this because he’s drunk, and walking upright is something drunk dogs do? Or is it because only bipedal dogs are advanced enough to go to bars and get drunk, even though they have to drink out of the toilet while they’re there? It’s a delight, I tell you, a damn awful delight.
Check out the sly smile on the plugger-lawyer. “I’m gettin’ paid $150 an hour for this shit! Can you believe it?”
I actually spent some time (OK, fine, like a minute and a half, but still) trying to figure out if there were some real cloud storage service that used a pig as a mascot. Because when a technical annoyance happens to a character in a legacy comic strip, I generally assume that that precise annoyance has also happened to someone involved in the creation of that legacy comic strip. I still sincerely believe that someone encountered the phrase “upgrade to pro” and thought “You know who needs to be upgraded to pro? Dagwood Bumstead, a character I write jokes about, that’s who! Hey-oooh.”
“Sure,” pluggers thought. “Your kids? They’re disappointments. Always wanting money. Never applying themselves at school. Never calling just say hi. But grandkids — grandkids are where the fun are.” This is the moment when the scales fall from their eyes. This is the moment when pluggers see — really see — exactly what it’s all about.
In yet another example of why the bird-people of Shoe should not participate in jokes that at all involve bird metaphors, the Perfesser has ordered some infants of his kind through the mail (which is something that you totally can do) and plans to raise one in order to marry her.
Family Circus, 6/15/16
“Maybe one day we’ll run off together,” Mommy whispers to PJ inside. “Maybe just the two of us. Maybe we’ll do it tonight.”
Rex Morgan, M.D., 6/15/16
You do have a fairy godmother, Sarah! A narrative fairy godmother. Just accept it! THERE’S NO ESCAPE