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Comics archive! Lockhorns

Rex reaches his breaking and/or brow-furrowing point

Rex Morgan, M.D., 2/3/16

They say millennials are abandoning the suburbs and prefer to live in walkable city neighborhoods. Is Sarah a millennial? She’s, what, six, but she was also six in 2004 when I started this blog, which means she was born in 1998 or thereabouts. That makes her Generation Z, which, c’mon guys, we’re gonna need a new name there. Anyhoo, Rex looks pretty perturbed at getting lifestyle advice from a six-year-old, but not really perturbed enough to do anything about it.

Lockhorns, 2/3/16

For everyone who thought the Lockhorns couldn’t accurately depict a modern-day hipster stereotype in that classic Lockhorns style: I guess this panel proved you wrong! They even got that look of withering contempt right, though I’m not sure if a stereotypical hipster would care that much that Leroy is name-checking a boxer who lost the heavyweight championship months ago.

Dennis the Menace, 2/3/16

Little-known fact: it’s possible to become so un-menacing that you loop all the way around and become menacing again. Among menaces, this tricky maneuver is called “the Eddie Haskell”.

The Lockhorns have 100 words for hate

Panel from The Lockhorns, 1/10/16

I love the way Leroy is delicately leaning up against the bookcase, but why do you suppose he’s idly thumbing through the thesaurus? Is this meant to indicate that he’s been waiting so long that he’s resorted to reading reference books for entertainment? Or maybe we’re meant to realize that his marital hell has so scarred him that he no longer has the vocabulary to describe it, and he’s desperate for new words that will truly convey the depths of his emotional torment.

Marvin, 1/10/16

Sure, I have a whole blog about comic strips, and sure, I complain about Marvin and his poop jokes about once a week on average, but there are still limits to how much space I allow the comics to occupy in my skull. For instance, I can’t remember whether Marvin’s grandparents who had to move into chez Marvin when they lost all their retirement savings are supposed to be Jeff’s parents or Jenny’s. And I refuse to look it up! You can’t make me! Even though knowing the answer would probably better help me get the family dynamics that establish the nuances of this strip, in which Grandpa opens his heart with Jeff and is cruelly mocked in return!

Rex Morgan, M.D., 1/10/16

Haha, of course Welton Green is part of Dolly Pierpoint’s sprawling mafia empire! Of course this guy knows all about Sarah and is probably under strict orders to let admit her! “The test is happening right now! Are you ready? Here it comes!” [winks exaggeratedly and hands Sarah a check]

Friday sadness

Gil Thorp, 12/4/15

I know I’ve been neglectful in keeping you up to date on the reality show antics in Gil Thorp, but suffice it to say that Holly and the reality show team are Bad, and the Thorps and their noble student-athletes are Good, except when those student-athletes fall under the siren spell of reality show stardom, at which point they become Bad. Mostly I wanted to point out today’s strip because it encapsulates the sad reality of being Marty Moon: not only does he get turned down for sex, but his getting turned down for sex doesn’t even merit a panel with him in it.

Lockhorns, 12/4/15

It seems kind of weird that the Lockhorns’ mail consists entirely of 4 x 6 pieces of paper, so I’m going to assume that these are actually cue cards with prompts written on them. Bored with their usual range of passive-aggressive interactions, they’re now mixing things up a little bit in an attempt to keep their hell-marriage hell-fresh. “Is this gonna be an ‘I loathe you’ card? Ooh, no, this one is ‘I loathe myself.’”